A lesson I learned about a person’s true value by watching my daughter interact with horses.
If you know me you know I LOVE horses. I find their presence so comforting and their innate knowledge and capability of reading people fascinating. I grew up around horses and enjoyed the simple pleasures that they give. For me, when I am stressed or anxious I find it grounding to go out to the horse pasture and take a moment to relax and connect with The Maker. When I am with horses life slows down, the stressors of life fade for a moment, and I become grounded.
My daughter has inherited my love (maybe obsession ) with horses. She LOVES spending time in the horse pasture. She dances and prances in the horse pasture, going off on some childhood chatter about horses and her passion for them.
A little Hide-n-Seek in the hay bale!
Through the world’s view
Recently, we got two new horses, mother, and daughter. The daughter, Dusty, was injured as a yearling by another horse, years later she has an obvious limp. Because of this injury, she is not rideable. Her previous owner told me that after the injury she’s didn’t know what she could ever be used for, some horses that are not rideable due to injury do not have a happy ending. Dusty, she has the sweetest demeanor, very affectionate and very curious. But what catches everyone’s eye first is her obvious lameness, making people’s perception of her go down. I have heard people describe her as worthless. It’s as if Dusty knows her sore shoulder is her focal point that lures people near, she then disengages from interaction when people asses her injured shoulder, as if she’s saying, “PLEASE! Just see me for me and not my flaw. I can be much more than a sore shoulder and obvious limp.”
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Through a child’s eyes
What I love most about children is their innocence, they see the world as more than a glass half full but bubbling over and flowing out around the glass.. They look at things for all that life is, not what it isn’t. Children tend to see the true beauty of things rather than the sometimes critical ways of adults .
When my daughter enters the pasture she sees Dusty for who she is, her authentic, pure, true value. She doesn’t notice the limp or how Dusty compensates for her sore shoulder. Dusty drawers closer as my daughter tells her how she’s the best horse ever, how much she loves her and how good she is . “Mommy, Dusty is so beautiful, she’s my favorite”.
Dusty follows my girl around, apparent that she values time with her because she doesn’t see what everyone else sees. My girl sees her for who she is. Dusty basks in this attention knowing that it is pure and wholly meant. Dusty enjoys spending time with My daughter as much as she loves engaging in childlike play and laughter.
Finding True Value
As I was standing in the pasture witnessing this interaction I was taken back. Our Creature sees us as flawless. He sees our worth, our true value beyond what people see. The devil wants us to believe that we are less than, he wants to lower our value. But the Creator of the earth and humans sees us as perfect. He is eager to engage with us and show us our true value, our worth. He sees us beyond our flaws and loves us unrelentingly. Ahhh, how freeing is that?! We are loved and valued no matter how we feel or what people say. Our Creator says we are loved, special and absolutely treasured in his eyes. I love this verse,
“For the Lord your God is living among you. He is a mighty savior.
He will take delight in you with gladness. With his love, he will calm all your fears.
He will rejoice over you with joyful songs.”
Zephiniah 3:17 (NLT)
Watching my daughter and Dusty interact I am reminded of this verse. The LORD of love is living among us and delights in spending time with us. If we are anxious or insecure about our worth, He is with us to calm those fears. He longs to connect with you and me to show us our true value. Because in his eyes we are PRICELESS!
Thank-you for reading, I hope you found this devotional thought a blessing! If you did, please share!
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So this blog is a passion post, a story of how our tiny house on our little farm went from a late night brain fart to a solid reality! Crazy dreams do come true!
How it began
How did we decide to get into the tiny movement? It wasn’t because it was the latest coolest thing to do. Rather, it was out of necessity. We had a 3 bedroom 1900 sqft home while Brady was in the Army. But he was getting medically discharged and we knew that the large house was not going to be feasible after getting out, so we had to make a change. We knew that we wanted to stay in Alaska but weren’t sure about the logistics. We wanted stability for our daughter, a home base that no matter what this near future took us we would have a place. So, as we were in what seemed like a peculiar Alice in Wonderland dream (nothing making much sense), we prayed for a plan, for guidance, a sign… anything to know what direction to go!
One evening we were watching good ole’ Netflix. We were scrolling thru what was available and saw a show about tiny living by HGTV. So we watched it. When it was around bedtime I was like, “Hey! We could do a tiny house! So no matter where we go, whether if we stay in Alaska or go south, our baby would always have the same house if we were to move!” I shared my idea with Brady, and he got excited.
The plan we went with
I took to craigslist, my go-to for anything we need. I found a tiny house ready to go but Brady, being the DIY man that he is, was like, “No! We could design and build our own!” I am telling you, by bedtime we had a rough design of a tiny house and potential trailers picked out on craigslist. This idea gave us direction. We didn’t know what life after the Army would be like, but this gave us a plan.
The planning
Wait one second… this is a cool idea, but where are we going to build it? We were living in a HOA community with rigid rules. I got resourceful and phoned a friend, literally. They agreed to let us build on their property. With the building location set, we began the planning. We were wanting a home that would be functional for a growing family, as we didn’t know how long we’d be in the tiny house. I think somewhere, sometime, we mentioned five years. After watching countless YouTube videos, all the tiny house shows we could find, and reading lots of blogs, we came up with a design that we liked. Little did we know it would change another 200+ times (and still is). But that’s the beauty of planning your own house design! Your home needs to suit you and be functional (and in a tiny house, multifunctional!).
Our little job foreman, feeding the “help”
The trailer
Hahaha! Oh, the memories flooding back as I write this! So back to the first night of this new adventure. Most tiny houses are on 8 ft wide trailers. That just sounded too narrow to me. Cause, guess what? I don’t like small spaces… at all! Ironic , right?
From the way we got the trailer to now, QUITE the transformation!We had to strip the floor off this trailer and paint it then put a new floor on it!
Anyways, that night as I was trolling craigslist for trailers, I found what I thought to be the PERFECT fit for us. It was a 10-foot wide trailer, and a massive 30′ long. We were going to have a “HUGE” tiny house, lol. I called and it was still available. I think it was the next day that we went to go look at it. Oh, my word, y’all. That trailer was sound and sturdy and all, but it needed help. It had a rotten nasty deck on it. I remember looking at it and thinking… this is a terrible idea. At about that time Brady tells the guy, “We’ll take it! We can pick it up tomorrow.” Oh my word, WHAT did he just say?! So we did it, we started the tiny house building journey.
installing subfloorvery tedious, my thought taking the picture , “its worth it, its worth it!”
Framing
FINALLY a Wall! the only wall without a window!
After a very tedious process of prepping the trailer and putting on the subfloor, we FINALLY began the process of framing. It was surprisingly a quick process! We had help from a friend and from my Dad while he visited. It was so exciting to see the walls go up, our home literally taking shape. I thought, “Dang, we are almost done!” Little did I know it was just the beginning.
Out little foreman directing daddy!back walls going up
After the framing things slowed down a bit, you know fishing, and oh! Telling us we were getting out of the Army in 12 months? Yeah, four months. And you’re on terminal leave. Heart attack. We had planned to take a YEAR to move into our house, timeline and budget wise. It threw us for a loop! Then hunting happened.
The final wall segment. Enlisting the help of a friend for this pieceDid I ever tell you I am afraid of heights AND small spaces?!
Moving
Roofing day, we chose to do it in a windstorm of all days!Ready for the first move!
We moved out of our big house to expedite selling it (lonnnnnnnnggggg stressful story for another day) and moved in with a very good friend. After we got the siding on the tiny house, we had to move it closer to where we were now staying. Let’s just say that move was adventure filled. Here’s the jist: hooked it up to Brady’s truck, glare ice, snow chains and brake lines going where they’re not supposed to, stranded, a friend with dump truck came to rescue us and haul the tiny house the rest of the way. Many prayers prayed, and all of them answered!
After we go it moved, we slowly started the inside work. By this time it was winter here and working in the cold was not fun, especially with a toddler.
our toyo stove came in handy for those winter work days. The foreman helping daddy measure.
The help
Brady was working as an EMT at the time and doing as much work on the tiny house as he could between shifts. Thankfully, my dad was able to come up for a month to help us finished it. He worked looooooonnnnnng days and I helped as much as I possibly could.
The timeline we were given to move the tiny house from that friend’s house was up and we needed to move it to our own property (now THAT was a true answer to prayer!)
backing it out of a friends driveway!
The tiny house, at that point, had the kitchen cabinets and countertops, bathroom, and closet roughed-in. The electrical was finished and the exterior walls were closed-in, and that’s about it. The plumbing and propane lines would have to wait until we got the tiny house to our place.
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Moving to our property
January 25th, 2017 we started the day working on the tiny house like any other. We were shooting for moving the tiny house in the next few days based on the weather and when our friend’s dump truck was available. Like I meantioned earlier, we have a BIG tiny house for being tiny. Brady’s truck *could* haul it but not without some serious concern,lol.
plumbing “fun”
I randomly checked the weather and, oh crap! A storm is coming TOMORROW! So I texted our friend with the dump truck and he said we could use it but only today as he needed it for work for the rest of the week. My dad was doing last minute electrical work and I said, “Hey we have to move it today, like right now!”
I gave my dad a ride to get the dump truck (he has his CDL). Man, we were crazy. We moved during rush hour. Which, its Alaska, how bad can it be? Well, when there is one highway to get everywhere and over 50,000 people are on their way home and we are moving a clumsy tiny house, its a big deal. Happy to report that the trip went smoothly until we got to our property… which is where we got the dump truck stuck, then Brady’s truck, then our friend’s truck. It was a mess (to be fair, there was 18″ of snow on the ground). But with LOTS of prayer and sweat, we got everyone unstuck.
Installing custom shower
Once there, we hooked up to the grid, finished the plumbing (SO tedious!), and set up the hot water heater and water pump. We will have to do a whole blog post on our plumbing saga with this tiny house. Did I mention we did all of this after moving to the property?! It is tricky to work on a tiny house while living in it.
Building and working
Not done yet!
Not finished but getting more like a home
As time has progressed we have made changes to the tiny house and made it a home. We are still working on updates and projects to make it more functional for our family (Be sure to subscribe to be notified for future posts!)
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our raw land, view from our driveway. This was the first spring hereBuilding a tiny house is EXHAUSTING (my face testifies) , but oh the memories made!
This year we celebrate two years of living on our property. It is, in a way, a childhood dream for both of us come true. A home that we built, on our own land with room for animals. It was a major step in our simply wild life. We have made a tradition for this day, January 25th. The first thing I baked in my new oven was an apple pie. So, in honor of this very momentous day, as any tradition goes, I am making an apple pie today (and gluten-free at that!).
We added a porch the following year
We hope you enjoyed this tiny house building journey in a nutshell. If you have questions or comments be sure to contact us, we’d love to hear from you!
Its not finished, the land is still raw but its our home.Eska Mountain and Granite Peak
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The big day is fast approaching and you’re in full nesting mode (it’s a real thing!)! Maybe you’re making a baby registry and are feeling a bit overwhelmed with all the choices. I’ve been there, twice! If (when?) I get to do it all over again, here are the FIRST 5 things I’ll be sure to get for my newborn.
Sleepers
This is kind of a no-brainer. Of coursebabies needs jammies! Heck, I use them all the time with my wee babes. I personally like the zip ones as opposed to the snap ones for those 2 am half awake diaper changes. Moment of truth right now: I keep my newborns in sleepers 24/7. Those adorable two piece outfits are CRAZY cute but they are uncomfortable for baby and cumbersome for exhausted mama. So I LOVE sleepers because they are functional and easy… and omg cute!
Muslin blankets
My babies run hot all the time, so this blanket was the best option for us. As it so happens, most babies don’t need layers and layers of warm clothing all the stinking time. However many layers that you are comfortable with inside your home is usually the same number of layers that your baby needs. So when it’s time to swaddle up your precious bundle, these thin blankets are perfect to keep from overheating your little one! I also like the versatility of them and that they are not very bulky. They store nicely, which is a hug perk for us in a tiny house.
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Booties
Socks are great, but they fall off. And those tiny shoes and boots are cute, but so hard to put on those flexible little feet! The solution? These little booties that I found don’t fall off and are easy-peasy to put on your baby’s feet! They are made of nice, soft fleece, which keep those precious baby toes warm and toasty. I also like the age range sizing on them. They go all the way to 4T. My toddler wouldn’t keep them on, but I love that there’s at least an option in her size. Definitely should be on your list, maybe order two pairs (I did).
Fridababy NoseFrida
You have probably seen these and then instantly said, “oh, heck no!” I get it, I did too. But, then I had a baby with a snuffly nose that couldn’t breathe and I was VERY grateful for this very effective baby tool! A must have, especially if you have a baby who has seasonal allergies. Even my sweet toddler will allow me to use this on her because she KNOWS its weird, but works!
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Baby K’tan
Okay, I am a believer in not just one carrier fits the needs for everything. But for the early days, I found the Baby K’tan a true blessing. Being a new mama, holding your sweet babe will eventually make your arms and shoulders get exhausted. So some genius, probably a sleep-deprived parent, created this amazing carrier. It holds the baby in a snug way that makes them feel like they are still in the womb, so they get nice and cozy and nap away. The Baby K’tan was the ONLY way I could get my sweet girl to sleep in those early days (thanks, GERD). They are sized according to your shirt size, which I find helpful. I’m my experience, these are the best all-round carrier from newborn to about 7 months. I’ll pave a post soon comparing the 5 carriers that we’ve tried and still use.
Why are these “The Necessities”?
So why these 5 things and not bottles, a wipe warmer, or that diaper trash can? Because, those things are nice, but not entirely necessary. I picked the top 5 things that I would want if I were on a deserted island with a newborn and I was allowed 5 things. These are seriously what I would choose, hands down. In my mind, these 5 things are absolutely necessary! I would LOVE to hear what your top 5 items are for a newborn, so comment below or send me an email!
Have you ever wondered, “How does the God of Creation see me?” In His eyes, are you good enough? Does it even matter? Yes, it matters! The answer to this question will define the tone of the relationship between you and God. I want to share with you the answer that I believe to be true. Let’s first start with the story of Gideon.
11 Now the Angel of the Lord came and sat under the terebinth tree which was in Ophrah, which belonged to Joash the Abiezrite, while his son Gideon threshed wheat in the winepress, in order to hide it from the Midianites.
12 And the Angel of the Lord appeared to him, and said to him, “The Lord is with you, you mighty man of valor!”
13 Gideon said to Him, “O my lord, if the Lord is with us, why then has all this happened to us? And where are all His miracles which our fathers told us about, saying, ‘Did not the Lord bring us up from Egypt?’ But now the Lord has forsaken us and delivered us into the hands of the Midianites.”
14 Then the Lord turned to him and said, “Go in this might of yours, and you shall save Israel from the hand of the Midianites. Have I not sent you?”
15 So he said to Him, “O my Lord, how can I save Israel? Indeed my clan is the weakest in Manasseh, and I am the least in my father’s house.”
16 And the Lord said to him, “Surely I will be with you, and you shall defeat the Midianites as one man.”
Judges 6:11-16 (NKJV) Bold added for emphasis
I grew up hearing this story and never paid much attention to this segment. Then one day during this last year, I was reading this passage while enjoying my morning coffee. The phrases in bold above stood out to me. I wondered, “Why did Jesus call Gideon a mighty man of valor? Gideon was hiding while threshing wheat and even calls himself the least of the weakest!”
I’ve been told many times that God chooses to work through those who are humble so that God receives the credit for the victory. That makes sense, but while it’s evident that Gideon does meet this “humble beginnings requirement,” that doesn’t answer my question about God’s word choice. He could just as easily have said, “Hey Gideon, congrats man! I’ve chosen you to free My people from the Midianites! Look, I know your low status, but I am going to empower you to do this seemingly impossible thing.” But He doesn’t say that! “You mighty man of valor!”
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Asking the Right Questions
I don’t believe that God was trying to boost Gideon’s ego or instill a false sense of self. By the time I had finished my coffee and was out the door to work, I had come to the conclusion that God said what He did because He sees us differently than how we perceive ourselves. As God told the prophet Samuel,
7 But the Lord said to Samuel, “Do not look at his appearance or at his physical stature, because I have ]refused him. For the Lord does not see as man sees; for man looks at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart.”
1 Samuel 16:7 (NKJV)
So my question changed from, “Why did God call Gideon a ‘mighty man of valor’?” to “What did God see in Gideon?” And by extension, “How does God see me?” I was finally led to the answer later that day while flipping through my pocket notebook (old habit from the Army). I have two Scriptures written down that caught my attention. I’ll highlight below the sections that helped me formulate my answer to “How does God see me?”
4 But God, who is rich in mercy, because of His great love with which He loved us, 5 even when we were dead in trespasses, made us alive together with Christ (by grace you have been saved), 6 and raised us up together, and made us sit together in the heavenly places in Christ Jesus, 7 that in the ages to come He might show the exceeding riches of His grace in His kindness toward us in Christ Jesus.
Ephesians 2:4-7 (NKJV) Bold added for emphasis
12 But this Man, after He had offered one sacrifice for sins forever, sat down at the right hand of God, 13 from that time waiting till His enemies are made His footstool. 14 For by one offering He has perfected forever those who are being sanctified.
Hebrews 10:12-14 (NKJV) Bold added for emphasis
Google Search for “How does God see me?” and before you finish typing you will see that someone else has already asked that question.
How do these passages help us understand how God sees us? These texts originally drew my attention because of the timeline paradox presented. Yes, Christ died as a sacrifice for my sins, Yes, He has raised me into a new life dedicated to loving God. But no, I’m not sitting with God in Heaven right now… not physically, at least. Also, while I strive to live righteously and in-line with God’s Will, I’m far from reaching perfection. But, Hebrews says “He has(past-tense, as in, “it’s done, “completed”) perfected those who are being(present-tense, as in, “still working on it”) sanctified.
We get full credit now, for what we will be once we are reunited with Christ Jesus.
So finally, I came to the conclusion that God sees our full, 100% perfected, potential. And not just “He sees what we may become” kinda potential like a football scout evaluating high school players. Instead, He sees us now, He identifies us now, as that future-self that we cannot even imagine! Just as He called the lowly Gideon a “mighty man of valor” based on the actions that Gideon would soon take in the Lord’s name, God calls you and me “perfect sons and daughters dwelling with Him” even now as we navigate through this sin-filled world still making mistakes.
This is encouraging to me because it reminds me that I serve the God of Love, who is desiring a relationship with me. I’m not bound to a god that is vindictive and looking for my flaws, who I must either appease or face punishment. While I’m focused on improving my relationship with my Heavenly Father, He readily forgives my flaws and counts me as already perfect.
I would love to hear your thoughts on this topic. Please comment below and/or send us an email with your thoughts. Share with your friends to help get the dialog going!
Who’s on a budget? And who of us just doesn’t plain love a good deal?! I know I do! I made this EASY and good-for-you, budget-friendly DIY body wash for around $2! Stay tuned, I’ll share the recipe!
Disclaimer: This post contains Affiliate Links for your convenience and at no additional cost to you.
So a few may be asking why is $2 body wash such a big deal? And I ask you, have you been around a 3 year old, specifically at bath time? They use a lot of bubbles! So, I need a body wash that is as cheap, as healthy, and as safe as possible!
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This quick and easy budget friendly body wash has only 3 simple ingredients (a win for a busy mama!). And like most bath products, the first ingredient is water. The other ingredients that you can’t get right out of the tap are unscented castile soap and a pure essential oil of your choice.
Castile Soap
I simply love this plant based product! I get the unscented kind so I can add my essential oils, and let me tell you, they pair well together. But the reason I love this stuff is because it’s so gentle on my kiddos sensitive skin! If you can’t find castile soap in your local store, you can get it here!
Essential Oil
The essential oil that I chose (and recommend) was Young Living’s lavender. Why Young Living essential oils? Well, you can read the full blog here, but in short, I trust that they are safe to use with my kids. The aromatic qualities of lavender help to soothe and relax, so perfect for just before bedtime! Keep in mind that I’m not diagnosing or treating anything here… just passing on my experiences.
Lavender
You can order Young Living’s lavender essential oil here after creating an account. But let’s be honest, we like a deal and! Once you get started with essential oils, you will find numerous uses for them (I’ll be posting DIY recipes). So, signing for a wholesale account would give you a 24% discount on every product from Young Living. …did someone say DEAL?! Dooooo itttt! Sign up for wholesale membership here (and check out this page for a bit more info about a Young Living membership)!
The oils you get with Premium starter kit!
Okaaaayyyy are you ready?
You will need:
A pump bottle, you can get one here or just reuse an old one like I did (budget!)
Add all three ingredients together and it’s ready to use! Gently shake before each use!
So great, I have this awesome body wash that the whole family can use, but what do I do with this extra Castile soap?! Well, you can make more body wash (perhaps a manly smelling one with Young Living’s Cedarwood or Valor blend??) OR I am working on the perfect LAUNDRY SOAP recipe so stay tuned for that!
Be sure comment and share if you found this helpful!
“What are those hippy smelling oils?” I can’t tell you how many times people have asked me this question. But I’ll let you in on a little secret; you don’t have to be a hippie to enjoy essential oils and their amazing benefits! So, what are essential oils and what’s so great about them? Sit back, relax, and I’ll give you the 411 in this intro to essential oils.
What areEssential Oils?
Essential oils are the life of the plant. They are a concentrated composite of all the unique chemicals that medicinal plants contain that give the plant its healing properties. They are generally extracted from the leaves (ex. Lavender) and petals (ex. Rose). Brady and I chose to become Young Living Essential Oil customers after observing operations at one of their herb farms and processing centers. Let me describe the steps in producing these amazing essential oils.
Young Living owns the farms and facilities used to produce their essential oils. This ensures consistency between batches and tight quality control adherence.
The plants are harvested at peak ripeness and then go through a steam distillation process to draw out the essential oil. The oil is then collected and bottled without additives to preserve its full, 100% pure potency. Why is the “no additive” part such a big deal? Well, that’s because the additives can be chemicals that cause harm to your skin… which defeats the purpose of using essential oils in the first place, right?! I experienced the Young Living difference when I applied some cheap brand at a health food store. I got a chemical burn! Ouch! But, when I used the same species of essential oil produced by Young Living, it HELPED my skin to repair itself and even boosted my skin’s overall look. I was sold on Young Living after that!
Because there is no essential oil regulation agency, any company can claim to make “therapeutic grade” essential oils, even if they use very little, if any, plant-based oil in their products. So how is Young Living different? They have a Seed-to-Seal promise. Meaning, they grow their OWN plants and distill and process their own oil. But wait, it gets better. You are WELCOME to go to their farms and see their distillation process and ask questions. To me, that speaks volumes to their integrity, which is why Young Living is the only essential oil producer that I trust when shopping for pure essential oils.
Visitors observing the steam distillation process at a Young Living farm.
How to Use Them
Now that we’ve talked about what essential oils are, let’s discuss how they can be used. It amazes me how versitle 100% pure essential oils are in helping us to boost our immune systems and improve overall quality of life. We personally use Young Living essential oils for everything from cooking and cleaning the kitchen to hygiene and hollisticremidies. They truly do help us reduce the toxins that are so prevelant in our everyday lives. Here are examples of the ways that you can use essential oils to also gain their benefits for your life!
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Aromatically – The most common way to use essential oils. Improving the smell of your home without the elaborate chemicals and accelerants found in commercial air fresheners, which can be harmful to your lungs. Diffusing essential oils also have an emotionally uplifting benefit as well due to their properties that balance the chemistry within your brain. Personally, I use the blend Release to help me during an anxiety attack to center and ground myself. Don’t let this route fool you into thinking that it is weak because of its indirect nature, I have used this method to calm my panicked 1200 pound horse!
Topically – Essential oils quickly absorb through the skin and cross into the bloodstream. The unique healing properties of each essential oil interact with your body on a cellular level to enhance tissue function. For me, Lavender is my go-to topical essential oil. I use it for so many things around the home, like body wash for the whole family, skin care for myself, beard oil for Brady, and even DIY butt balm to fight diaper rash. Peppermint and Wintergreen are powerful against muscle and joint aches, and are our favorite for immediate pain relief.
Internally – This is ONLY recommended with quality, 100% pure essential oils such as those produced by Young Living. Young Living has a product line called “Vitality” that contains all their essential oils and other products that are safe for consumption. An example would be Digize, a blend of oils that supports your digestive system. Brady will use it by placing a drop or two in his mouth before meals to prevent heartburn. At the first sign of sickness, we will fill up and swallow a capsule with Oregano and Basil essential oils, which often times nips the sickness in-the-bud.
Young Living’s “Vitality” line is safety to use in cooking and baking.
So, why do I neeeeed essential oils in my life? Let me share with you my WHY!
Growing up, I was raised that if Pinesol or bleach couldn’t do the cleaning job, then nothing else could. But, I was always puzzled by why they always made me feel nauseous when I was around them. Well, it’s because the chemicals are so potent that they can actually do damage to your cells. Don’t get me started on cosmetics! What girl doesn’t like to smell pretty? I sure do! The perfume I was using was full of parabens, which are linked to increased cancer rates, and I was putting that on my skin! And when I became a mama, I checked out baby soap and lotions and found the same thing. Now, I wouldn’t jump straight to “I’m a hippie,” but why would I want to put those harsh chemicals on myself and my babies and then clean my home with them? So I made the switch to Young Living products and actually SAVE money as well! Win-win. If you haven’t looked, you might be surprised by the wide range of health and household products that they make.
Hello ladies! Sooo, as we’re kicking-off the Simply Wild Project, I was challenged to post a video. I won’t go on and on about how awkward it was talking to myself on the phone, but I will say that we’ll eventually be posting more videos. Anyhow, here are my top 3 recommendations for new (and experienced) breastfeeding mamas! Thanks for watching!
November 17, 2016, I peed on the stick. A few minutes later, there was the double line… positive. I was engulfed in emotions. The year had been a rough one with Brady being abruptly medically discharged from the Army, selling our house, living out of a suitcase for months and feeling misplaced. I walked out of the bathroom, crawled into the bed, and told Brady he was going to be a daddy again, that our darling child was on its way. He smiled the biggest smile I had seen in a while, given the stress we were under building our tiny house while he was, at the time, in EMT training.
On my birthday a few days later, we went on a date to celebrate my birthday and our happy news. I felt great the whole pregnancy, no morning sickness but craving carrots. We had planned a trip to Nebraska for the first week of December for my brother’s nursing school graduation. We were going to break the exciting news about the bun in the oven to both of our families.
After 10 hours of not-so-great airline travel, our little and growing family arrived in Nebraska to reunite with our extended family. That evening, at about 6 weeks gestation, my worst nightmare began; I started bleeding… a lot. The next day, December 8th, we lost our precious, darling child due to miscarriage.
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I struggled with grief, with sorrow, and with gut-wrenching emotional pain. I have never in my life felt so much sadness and heart break in the days, weeks, and months that followed. I was an emotional mess. I knew God was near, even though I couldn’t feel Him. I begged Him to give me back my baby. I longed just to hold and to see my baby; I’d give anything for just a moment. I didn’t really allow myself to outwardly grieve because I wanted to be strong for my daughter, she needed me.
Our due date would have been in the first week of August 2017. I avoided feeling anything, even though I wanted so badly for my baby to magically appear in my belly. I felt that I had missed out on experiencing another birth, to bringing another life into the world. I remember praying, “God help me, I need you to show yourself to me!”
At my daughter’s pleading one evening, I forced myself outside to play with her… and the Lord of Love met me there. I experienced the love of my Heavenly Father, and it was the first time in a long time that my heart awakened since that dreadful day.
That night, I was able to write this letter to my baby:
My darling child,
This is such a hard week for me. My belly should be big and filled with your busy little movements as we eagerly anticipate the day of your arrival. How I long to put my hands on my tummy and pat you gently as you move about. Even to feel your gentle thump of hiccups against my pelvis. I sometimes day dream about how much hair you’d have, if you look like your sister or daddy. I wonder if you would be a sleepy baby or very active.
Today, as I was picking wildflowers with your sister, I was filled with God’s peace as I gently plucked the flowers from the stem. It was there that God assured me that no matter what He will provide and take care of us, of me, this week. He assured me that I don’t have to pretend I’m okay, that I can cry, and that I can miss you. It was in that moment that the phrase, “the joy HE has set before us” came into my mind. The joy is Jesus coming to take us home, the joy of reuniting with you, holding you. My arms ache to hold you, feel you and look at your sweet face.
Baby, I’d do anything, anything at all to hold you just for a moment. This isn’t goodbye, this isn’t I’m moving on. This is I love you, and I always, always will.
Love, Your mama
No matter the gestational age, a loss is a loss – life is precious at any age. Heaven, Jesus’s return, got a lot more special to my family on December 8, 2016. If you’ve experienced such loss, whether you be a mama or a daddy, feel free to reach out and talk with us. You are not alone!
Be strong and courageous! Do not be afraid of them! The Lord your God will go ahead of you. He will neither fail you nor forsake you. Deuteronomy 31:6
In my pre-college and college years, I would quietly enjoy reading Bible chapters for my devotional. When I became a mama, I found that my time was filled with the needs of my children (sound familiar?) and I found myself not able to read anything without several interruptions. I learned to treasure finding a passage and meditating on it throughout the day. I call them my power texts. I am so grateful for the quiet time I was able to have in my pre-mama life to highlight treasured verses in my Bible that nourish my soul. My Bible is literally glowing with highlights!
So about this verse! Be strong. Wow, yes Lord, I NEED your strength to get through this day! Be courageous. There are so many times in the mama journey that we need the Lord’s strength to help us nurture and care for the precious babes He blessed us with. But courage, courage to stand up for your kiddos, courage to follow your instincts in a society that tells you to NOT listen to your instincts.
Here’s the part of the verse that I love. The Lord your God will go AHEAD of you. Y’all. I don’t know about you, but motherhood can feel lonely. My husband is in nursing school which means a TON of time away from home, and homework when he is home. I have been feeling alone. But, I love this part of the verse because no matter what I face today, this week, month or year, God is going before me – I am not alone! He’s got my back, and not just in big issues but the little things. Day to day little things. He is with us – you and me. I love my relationship-seeking, ever-with me God!
Go forward in this day knowing that you are strong and courageous and you have the God of the universe at your side!
